Modern society, particularly capitalism-driven societies, are obsessed with the idea of getting more done in less time with fewer resources.

We’re constantly bombarded with advertisements touting the ability of items to arrive faster (next day delivery!), for garments to be produced cheaper (fast fashion trends!), and even for your nutrients to be delivered more effectively (supplements in powders!).

I won’t lie, I’ve long been a believer in all things productivity and efficiency.

This type of focus on perpetually getting more done certainly has its benefits, but also its consequences.

When I was an undergraduate, I suffered from intense insomnia, likely brought on by severe anxiety resulting from fear of not living up to family success standards. Most days, I simply could not sleep. 

I don’t meant the type of “I can’t fall asleep” that happens when you have a lot on your mind and eventually you quiet the noise and settle into a comfortable slumber.  I mean the type of “I can’t fall asleep” that as much as I tried, as exhausted as I physically was, my mind would never quiet enough for me to enter any form of restful sleep. 

Nearly every night for 3 years I did everything but sleep at night—studying, running, movie watching, people watching, whatever—and averaged about 30 to 90 minutes of nap time during the early morning hours.

The way I saw it, on one hand, yes my body felt like it was coming apart all the time, but on the other hand, I was getting so much done with those stolen non-sleep hours every day! I felt like I was the epitome of high productivity.

On my own, I naturally gravitated toward focus and productivity best practices:

I developed habits that dedicated specific spaces with work vs non-work, and I only did work in its rightful space.

I prioritized my tasks, taking on the most important ones early in the day to have greatest impact.

I engaged in one activity at a time, careful not to attempt multitasking since it doesn’t work.

Thankfully, I’m no longer in the grips of insomnia.  How having a family of my own, I’m also no longer accountable for only myself.  Throughout all my years of marriage and children, I’ve been able to continue my productivity practices and jump successfully from one task to another.  However, that ability to focus likely only happened because I’m in the mere 27 percent of working mothers who is able to hire a sitter or nanny.

These past few months of being back in the US and me working on multiple pet projects while also maintaining my healthcare career responsibilities have tested the true possibilities of multitasking and productivity for working women.  

My days start at 3am, with meetings across multiple zones continuing to about 12 noon.  From then until 6pm, I must implement the management systems for my business, write articles toward developing this blog, and create all the visual content related to each workstream for @chinnyco and Company is YOU! 

I’m attempting to do all of this without a nanny and with the kids being homeschooled due to the pandemic.

I’m also attempting to not lose my mind.

Throughout all the books I’ve read and research I’ve seen on productivity, it’s becoming clear that the productivity industry’s tips and tricks are significantly more difficult to implement when you are the central caretaker for your family.  As much as I’ve tried to stick to my former habits, they don’t work as well when tiny humans and one big human are dependent on your time and energy to stay alive. The traditional practices of productivity aren’t geared toward working women without domestic staff.  

Trying to do my work only at my designated work desk would mean I can’t keep an eye on them in other parts of the house.

Prioritizing my work tasks for the mornings would mean I can’t bathe, dress, and feed them after they wake up.

Engaging in only one activity at a time would mean I can’t engage in much without ignoring either them or my work.

Instead of looking to the usual “gurus” for productivity holy grails, I now take their tips and tweak them to what works best for my own purposes. 

I often work at my desk, but I can also work with my laptop on my knees on the couch while the kids are jumping around me.

I can prioritize my work tasks to do in the mornings, but I can also plan to get those things done after 9am or 10am once everyone is fed and settled.

I can focus on one task at a time, but I can also drive while listening to an audiobook not music (instead of being an audiobook snob in favor of real books) or cook dinner while on a project call.

I also accept that I can’t do it all and I’d only cause myself cognitive dissonance if I buy too much into the “You can have it all!” rhetoric.  I have hopes and dreams I create then push myself to accomplish, so much of my stress is self-induced.  Productivity is relative. I do what I can, take it day-by-day, and always find ways to maintain my happiness.